Do you see the glass half empty of half full?

When you meet someone new, do you see something positive about them or is your first impression something negative?

We lived in Colorado Springs for a time in our lives, and we were mostly unhappy there.  We didn’t like the Bishop because he seemed cold and stand offish, he being a retired military colonel; we didn’t like the weather….. it was so erratic ; we missed our old friends in Utah; since there were lots of military people there we thought they were always trying to prove why their branch of the military (Army base on one end of town; Naval Academy on the other) was the best defense for our country.  This was our story.

Did we ever like living there?  I would have to answer no. We so wanted to move back to Utah.

We kept thinking the same thoughts over and over; so, we kept feeling unhappy.

I didn’t know that the most valuable powerful and part of our body is our brain. When I understood just what a magnificent asset it is to me, my whole outlook on life changed.  I became the force behind my destiny of living the life I wanted to live.

It tells us when were hungry.  It tells us when we’re sad.  It tells us when we’ve broken a bone.  It tells when we’re in danger.  It tells us when we are excited.  It tells us when to breathe.

Some parts of our brain we have control over. We do have power over our brain to feel what we want to feel.

We tell our brain what we want to feel; then we if we choose the thoughts that will allow us to feel that way, we have control over feeling any way we want to feel.  That means, we can choose to feel more of the feelings we want to feel and less of the ones we don’t want to feel


We have programed our brain from childhood to think we had no choice in feeling how we want feel.  We have been conditioned to think that it’s what’s happening to us or what someone says to us that makes a feel a certain way.  

That’s not true.  It’s how we view the situation, or what we make the situation mean that triggers thoughts about the situation that causes us to feel a certain way.

Whatever thoughts we choose to think, determines if we experience a positive emotion or a negative emotion.

Because we are human, we don’t consciously make a deliberate choice about what thought to think that will cause us to feel a positive emotion.

The good news is we can reprogram our brain….and with practice, our brain will help us to default to the positive thoughts so we can feel positive feelings.

Our brain is like a computer.  When we google something (I love that google is now a verb), a dropdown menu appears of suggestions of what we might be looking for.  [Sidenote; did you know if two people typed in the exact same words, their dropdown menu of suggestions will be different?]. 

When we always focus on the negative, we have told our brain that this is what we are searching for.  We have given our brain the assignment to look for the negative.  Brains thrive on assignments and problems to solve. It goes to work to find all the evidence it can to give you thoughts to keep feeling negative.  It will give you a dropdown menu of several negative choices that it thinks will be useful to you on maintaining your negative focus.

If I had the thought, “I don’t like living in Colorado Springs, yet. Because we moved to Colorado Springs, it afforded the opportunity to push us to buy a house instead of rent”. My brain would have picked up that I had given it a new assignment….”Oh, so now she thinks that maybe it was a good thing to move here; I think she wants to feel happy here.  I’ll start looking for evidence to help her find reasons to be happy”.

This is how we give our brain assignments that will help us be more positive; to deliberately choose our feelings.

  1. We take responsibility for our feelings; we don’t blame the circumstance.
  2. We tell our brain how we want to feel.
  3. We focus on a positive perspective of the situation; find one positive thought to think about the situation.  
  4. Your brain has now been given the que you have given it a new assignment; to help you find evidence of why your new thought is true. 
  5. Your brain helps you see the evidence by helping you choose more positive thoughts about the situation.
  6. You start feeling more positive about the circumstance.

Easy to say, harder to do.  The key is, how willing are to practice thinking that positive thought?

You want to feel love and connection with your adult children; reprogram your brain to focus on the positive.  

I believe that is how we open our minds to receiving inspiration from the Holy Ghost.  When we think negative thoughts about someone, we shut our minds and hearts from feeling love. You can’t hear or feel what the Spirit is trying to say that will help you unconditionally love your adult children when you are focused on what’s not going.

Love is ALWAYS an option.  I can help you choose love.  Christ wouldn’t ask us to love everyone if it wasn’t possible.

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