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I  remember a song by Michael McClain, “Which Part Is Mine?”

 In this song a mother asks herself in the middle of a sleepless night,

“Did she give her sons too much freedom?

Had she smothered her teenage daughters?

Did she spoil then too much or not trust them enough to prepare them for life in the world?

So she opened her heart to the heavens and she spoke of her children by name.

And the prayer that she prayed that her kids would be save

Had a familiar refrain----she said

Which part is mine?  And God which part is yours?

After I’ve done my best, I know you’ll do the rest.”

When our kids are adults it gets even cloudier about which part is ours and which part is His.

In the Book of Mormon (2Nephi: 25), it reads “we labor diligently to persuade our children tom believe in Christ and to reconciled to God….after ALL WE CAN DO.

But God’s timing is not our timing; God’s ways are not our ways.

We don’t get it our way.

When are children are making poor choices in their lives and taking wrong turns, it’s often in these choices and turns that they learn what they are supposed to learn.

There are families where it appears that no wrong choices are being made.  Appears is the operative word.  No family is void of challenges.  Without trials we would not grow; we know when we are growing it's always accompanied with some discomfort; without some suffering we would know no happiness.

We have to do all we can to love and understand our children when they are making challenging decisions; we also petition to the God to help us know how to do this.

Here are four suggestions for asking God for help:

  1.  Everything asked of God needs to be predicated upon His will.
  2.  Elder Bednar said that when we ask God for help, we should be asking for Him to help  us to know what we need to do or say in order to cause our request to happen.
  3. Ask God to help us understand what our children are feeling when they go through these unanticipated experiences.
  4. Ask God to help us know how to show love and support without condoning their behavior.

A friend once told me that his daughter came to him and said that she was going to move into an apartment with a guy who was just a friend.  His response was, “If you want to know how I feel you’ll have to ask me.”  A couple days later she came to him and said she had decided to move in with some girls.

“…..Pray always…..that your children may be blessed.”  (The Book of Mormon, 3Nephi: 18)

Powerful prayer is an action; if the prayer is coming from a feeling of love, the thoughts causing the feeling are loving thoughts; your result will be a clear answer

Prayers caused by feelings of fear and hopelessness, thoughts causing those feelings are judgmental and close-minded; the result may not be as clear.

Answers to prayers coming from love and hope are usually heard, whereas answers to prayers coming from fear and despair are often not as certain and as loud.

Why?  Because love always wins; loves helps us show up as the parents we want to be.

I can help you learn how to choose love.  Click the tab below to book a call for a free 60-minute consult.

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